My husband and I are on a two year path of making BM own her own mistakes. It is sometimes not easy because, often, when she is making them, it is the children that lose out. We used to rush to make things right for the kids when she would screw up.
But now....we just let her fail. We don't set her up to fail, but when it happens, we don't jump to bail her out.
Case in point....last night. Tuesday nights are her mid-week visitation. Youngest stepson had a game at 7:30. Oldest stepson had a practice from 6pm-8pm. My husband offered to take youngest stepson to his game and she could meet them there after picking up oldest stepson.
No response so he figured she had gotten her boyfriend or sister to pick up up oldest stepson. No...her plan was to leave youngest stepson at the game because she ASSUMED my husband would be there. Except he wasn't...when she didn't need his help (or so he thought since she didn't communicate with him), he told youngest stepson he would not be at his game (the first he has missed all season) because he needed to work on my van. When she found out, she was livid. She, who has missed the majority of the stepkids games and events this year, accused my husband of being a bad father for missing ONE game.
My husband told her he would call oldest stepson's coach and see if he could drop him at our house after practice and she could pick him up on the way home after youngest son's ball game. No, that is not good enough. She DEMANDED that my husband come to youngest son's game. My husband stood his ground. Even though a reasonable solution had been offered....it was not the solution SHE wanted.
One would think, after so many trips around this block, she would learn and start communicating. BUT NO. We travel this path so often, it almost feels like deja vu!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment